My blog

Category: AUDHD

  • Challenges of Eating on the Autism Spectrum

    Autistic limited diet- Autistic people on the spectrum can experience increased sensitivity to light, touch, sound, and taste. This increased sensitivity can influence the variety of foods that they eat. Dietary considerations associated with Autism include, eating a limited diet- a small number of foods similar in colour and taste. Foods that are predictable may be preferred, for example one Big Mac looks, smells and tastes the same as any other Big Mac (or should do) therefore it is safe and predictable. Bananas on the other hand, differ in shape, colour and, taste and are unpredictable.

    Sounds Familiar?

    This sums me to a T. I’ve always had a problem with my weight, the problem being, that I have too much of it. I couldn’t understand why I had a set of rules around food. Growing up my world would implode if I couldn’t sit in a certain seat, facing a certain way. Parents, teachers and dinner ladies just couldn’t understand why I would choose to go without food if I couldn’t sit in a certain seat. I got told off a lot, this started my unhealthy relationship with food and eating. I was always told that I was cutting my nose off to spite my face. I’m autistic and the poetry of language sometimes eludes me. I didn’t understand that saying, I wasn’t cutting my nose off, I was refusing to put food in my mouth, I don’t eat with my nose!

    I suppose one thing that made it worse in primary school, was that my mother worked as a dinner lady (it was a small school, about 75 pupils) and when I used to get home from school in the afternoon, she would tell me that I had embarrassed her in front of everyone. I just couldn’t verbalise why I had to sit where I wanted to sit. Even now I have my very own seat at home, that no-one else uses when I’m around. If, on the exceedingly rare occasion we’re eating out, my family lets me pick where we’re sitting, it’s safer for me that way.

    Knife and Fork, Spoon Please!

    Cutlery is another sticking point. When I buy new cutlery, I must hold and rub every spoon in the shop. You see it’s the spoons that can make or break a mealtime. The spoon must be the right shape, size and feel. After I have bought the cutlery it’s that cutlery all the time. I have several different sets at home, but I only use certain ones. Spoons are my go-to for eating, they feel nicer than a fork. So, I cut my meals into bit sized pieces and then eat with a spoon.

    Drinks have a certain quirk Aswell, I use what I call Sippy cups, drinking beakers with a lid and a straw. There is method in my madness, if there is a lid nothing can get in my drink (dust, bugs etc). that maybe an OCD thing, but I only drink through a straw. I don’t like people using the same cups as me, so I have my very own special ones.

    When I go out, I pack my own cutlery and straws just in case, but I always have my own Sippy cup full of juice with me. Honestly, it’s like packing a bag for a toddler.

    The times of meals are also structured, breakfast when I wake up, lunch at midday and evening meal between 4pm and 5pm. I panic if those times deviate in any way. If I haven’t eaten my evening meal by half past 5, I don’t eat. It’s too late, it’s out of rhyme and rhythm. That is probably cutting my nose off to spite my face.

    Milk.

    Like I said earlier, I have always struggled with my weight. As a baby I had an illness which required me to take steroids for a while. These medications ballooned me up to look like the Michelin man’s child. Ever since then I have been, let’s call it bonny. It’s only within the last few years I have been able to stomach breakfast, literally I would always be sick after eating in a morning. I got bored of this day in, day out, so I cut out the middleman and didn’t eat. When I did eat breakfast, it was always toast. I don’t drink milk so cereal just wasn’t a choice for me. I was a fussy eater growing up and even now.

    What is for Lunch?

    Certain foods can’t touch, things must be eaten in a certain order and 9 times out of 10, they are eaten out of a bowl. I struggle with lunch; I can’t get past the sandwich way. Other foods don’t seem to fit in with the lunch time vibe, I’ve tried bigger meals like salads and pasta, but it all seems a bit too much for lunch. So, I stick with a sandwich, as I’m writing this, I have some lovely home boiled ham in the fridge just calling out for a bread roll and apple sauce. Nothing fancy.

    Just call me Nigella.

    Evening meals can be stressful, and I normally start to stim about it. I get overwhelmed. I have an arsenal of tried and tested recipes in my head, and I normally stick to those, remember, safe. I can put together meat and 2 veg no problem, but if I have to start a new recipe it is so daunting. I like to cook from scratch, not processed, I like to know what is in my food, OCD again. I have to meal plan and buy all the ingredients for the following week, I can’t just open the fridge and say well I’ll throw that and that together, I just can’t react quickly. Me and spontaneity just don’t go together.

    Longest Pregnancy Ever.

    I have food cravings, think being pregnant for the last 40 years. Some days it’s mustard some days it’s beetroot, never at the same time, which would be just weird! These cravings can last for months, at one period of my mustard phase I was eating ham and mustard sandwiches for lunch and evening meal every day for 4 months, then all of a sudden during a sandwich, I said nope, I don’t want that anymore and moved onto the next craving.

    I fall out with food a lot. When I am in-between cravings, I am lost, I don’t want to eat, it doesn’t interest me and I get bored. I lose my comfort and safe place. Eating the same thing all the time isn’t healthy and can border on infatuation, not to mention expensive. Its ok if I’m craving food that is cheap to buy but when it is something expensive the price adds up over the week, I’m not craving caviar just yet.

    Mush, Yuck!, Give me the Chunk.

    Texture of food is another big problem, I can’t eat a bowl of mush, mashed potatoes are a no-no, and soup must be chunky. Meat that has fast still on it makes me shiver inside. I like crispy chewy things that don’t look anaemic. Meat must be well done, no red stuff coming from it, I can feel Gordon Ramsey rolling his eyes, but no, just no.

    To sum up, food is a big problem for me, and I don’t see any way of solving that problem. I’ll just continue with the quirks, you can find me at the designated mealtime, in the same seat, with the same cutlery with my bowl and with my crispy food.

    Kayleigh x

    Just Pootling Along

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  • The Echolalia Quirk.

    also known as the ability to out-do Spotify.

    Echolalia – repetition of words just spoken by another person. Occurring with certain neurological, Neurodevelopmental or mental conditions.

    Echolalia is common with ADHD, Autism spectrum disorder and Tourette’s syndrome. The repetition can be words or phrases. Researchers believe this symptom happens due to frontal lobe dysfunction. This is the area of the brain that manages your thoughts, movements and memory.

    There are three theories relating to this.

     Dopamine dysregulation theory, is where too much, or too little can affect the way your brain tells your body how to communicate.

    The broken mirror neuron theory is where specialised neurons aren’t working as expected.

    The wealth of stimulus hypothesis, is where there is a disconnect between what you learn and how your body responds to it.

    But now for, echolalia and me…. certain words sound and physically feel nice to say, other AuDHDers would say the same.

    PIG.

    Photo by Cats Coming on Pexels.com

    PIG is a word that feels great to say over and over and OVER again. Though PIG feels great for me to say, some people may take offence, if they walk past me in the street. I really have to bite my tongue sometimes.

    Chick, Chick, Chick, Chick, Chicken

    There was an eventful shopping trip once. Whilst packing my shopping at a fast pace (I won’t name the shop), this one particular time, I had bought a pack of chicken breasts. Now I must say that with every item I put in the trolley I had said the name of it in my head. Back to the chicken, well the word “chicken” just seemed to roll off the tongue. It rolled off the tongue in the form off a song and let’s just say it wasn’t an inner monologue. I was in my happy oblivious world of white dancing hippos, fluffy clouds and tiramisu (yum). my husband caught my attention and as the white hippos took their bow, I realised where I was and what I was doing. I apologised profusely and continued packing the trolley, unfortunately I now had naked chickens dancing through rainclouds, going through my head.

    Thank You for the Music.

    Photo by Jepoy Fabian on Pexels.com

    Don’t get me started on songs…. Ok I’ve started. I seem to have a sub library of song lyrics available 24/7 at a moments notice, just call me Spotify on steroids. These can be blurted out at the most inopportune moments. At a male relatives funeral once, the speaker told us that “he always did it his own way” well here we go. I’m sat there head lowered, shoulders jiggling, not with tears but with giggles. Trying so hard not to channel my very own Frank Sinatra.

    Once a lyric is in my head it is repeated like a revolving door on black Friday. Just one line on repeat. I feel like a stuck gramophone. I am just glad I don’t have to pay the royalties.

    You can pick your friends but not your family.

    My family torments me sometimes, especially my adult daughter, knowing there are some phrases that trigger me.

    People of a certain age, ahem…. People who are old enough will understand the next few phrases. When my daughter feels in the mood to see me squirm, she’ll shout “Mother, I need to ask you something”. At this point I’ll stop doing whatever I’m doing and walk to the sound of her voice. “what’s up?” I’ll ask her. And this is where you’ll be old enough to know the answer or if you’re lucky enough not to know, ask your parents.

    with a totally straight face she’ll ask me…. Who lives at the bottom of the garden? My eyes close, and my lips purse as she laughs out loud, I say yep, yes, yeah down at the bottom of the garden, among the birds and the bees, live a lot of little people, called the Poddington peas. The conversations always go the same, but she’ll change the kids TV programme. Mum, where did Mr spoon go? Oh, for heaven’s sake, we’re off to Button Moon, we’ve followed Mr Spoon, Button Moon. Numerous Magic Roundabout quotes, oh Florence. Then here comes the big one…. BBBBbuuuuurrrrrkkkkKKEEEE – don’t you open that trap door, cos there’s something down there! Even as I write this, I’m singing all of these, lets see which one sticks till I fall asleep.

    You can find me by the sweetcorn….

    My life is surrounded by echolalia. I know it, my family know it. If I ever get lost in a supermarket all they have to shout is “der, der, der” and all day, every day I will answer back “Green Giant”.

    I’m predictable and stable with these stims. Sometimes they can be frustrating, but they are harmless. My family torment, but it’s done with love. I don’t have the maths ‘tism, but do I have the ability to remember lyrics, adverts and TV shows from over thirty years ago.

    So here I am signing off.

    Now where did Mr Spoon go?

    Kayleigh x

    Just pootling along

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  • Quirks and other Super Powers.

    and yes I did cringe at writing Super powers.

    As a relatively recent recipient of a diagnosis of Autism and ADHD (AuDHD), wow so many letters after my name. I haven’t written my acceptance speech yet. I was asked to compile a list of traits that I have. Traits, or Quirks as they are called in our house, vary person to person with a diagnosis on the spectrum. Most people with a diagnosis of Autism, ADHD or in this sarcastic world, both (two disorders that are polar opposites of each other), can relate to these traits.

    In these posts I’m going to look at some of my Quirks, can you relate to any of them?. I have an inquiring mind, tell me some of your Quirks. please share any tips and tricks that you use to navigate around them.

    I’d love to hear some of your stories.

    RIGHT, time to stop procrastinating (yep, that’s another Quirk).

    Just pootling along

    Kayleigh x

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  • Urgent Need for ADHD Diagnosis Services in Derbyshire

    Kayleigh Northall

    The lack of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) diagnosis services in Derbyshire has become a pressing issue, leaving many individuals and families struggling to find the support they need. Despite the increasing awareness of the disorder and its impact on people’s lives, the resources available in Derbyshire remain insufficient, leading to long waiting times and inadequate care.

    The demand for ADHD services has surged in recent years, but the healthcare system has not kept pace with this growing need. As a result, individuals often have to wait months, or even years, to receive a diagnosis. This delay can have significant consequences, particularly for children and young adults, who may struggle with their education and social interactions without the appropriate support.

    The shortage of specialist services in Derbyshire further exacerbates the problem. While there are some dedicated clinics and support groups, they are often overwhelmed by the sheer number of referrals. The ADHD Centre in Derbyshire, for example, offers comprehensive assessments and personalised treatment plans, but the high demand means that people are left waiting for extended periods.

    The lack of timely intervention can lead to a deterioration in mental health and well-being, as individuals often experience anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. These mental health disorders can be treated individually with multiple medications, but the lack of a formal diagnosis leads to a lack of appropriate medication. Those individuals who are formally diagnosed, can access medication specifically designed to alleviate the symptoms of the disorder. This in-turn can mitigate the symptoms of anxiety and depression. They can also access further support from professionals who are specialised in this field, schools, councils, and therapy. Without the diagnosis of ADHD, these support systems are frustratingly just out of reach, leaving a feeling of being in limbo and unable to live their life to its full potential.

    Parents and caregivers are also affected by the lack of diagnosis services in Derbyshire. Many parents report feeling frustrated and helpless as they navigate the complex and often confusing process of seeking a diagnosis for their child. The Derbyshire Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust provides some support through its specialist Nursing Ser vice, which collaborates closely with the Community Paediatrician Service to offer assessments and medication management. However, the limited availability of these services means that families are left without the help they desperately need.

    The impact of the lack of ADHD diagnosis services in Derbyshire is not limited to children and young adults. Adults also face significant challenges in accessing the support they need. A numberless amount of adults go undiagnosed for years, struggling with symptoms that   affect their work, relationships, and overall quality of life. The ADHD Centre in Derbyshire offers services for adults, including diagnostic assessments, medication management, and psychological therapies. However, the high demand for these services means that many adults are left waiting for help, often feeling isolated and misunderstood.

    The lack of ADHD diagnosis services in Derbyshire is a critical issue that needs urgent attention. The long waiting times and shortage of specialist services are leaving individuals and families without the support they need to manage the challenges of the disorder. It is essential for healthcare providers and policymakers to address this gap in services, ensuring that everyone in Derbyshire has access to timely and effective diagnosis and treatment. By doing so, we can improve the lives of those affected and create a more inclusive and supportive community for all.

    Kayleigh Northall

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  • Understanding Late Autism Diagnosis in Women

    Kayleigh Northall

    Late diagnosis of autism in female adults is a topic that has been gaining attention in recent years. Women with autism often present differently than men, leading to misdiagnosis or under-diagnosis. This can result in a lifetime of social difficulties, sensory sensitivities, and mental health issues. However, receiving a diagnosis can have a positive impact on their confidence and self-esteem, helping them understand their past and navigate their future with better support and resources.

    Women with autism tend to camouflage their symptoms, a phenomenon known as “masking.” This can make it difficult for family, teachers, and primary care physicians to recognise the signs of autism. As a result, many women go undiagnosed until later in life, often after their children are diagnosed. This late diagnosis can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it can bring relief and validation, helping women make sense of their past struggles. On the other hand, it can also bring up feelings of regret and anger for not being diagnosed earlier.

    One of the main reasons why women begin to wonder whether they have autism, is through a lifetime of social difficulties. Women with autism often find it difficult to read and respond to social cues. They may feel socially anxious, ruminate on their social interactions, and end up feeling left out and lonely despite their best efforts to be sociable. This can lead to a cycle of social failure and self-judgement, further exacerbating their mental health issues.

    Sensory sensitivity is another common trait among women with autism. They may have a heightened sense of awareness when it comes to smells, light, sounds and touch. This can make everyday activities like going shopping or crossing roads overwhelming and exhausting. Understanding and accommodating these sensory sensitivities can improve their quality of life.

    Receiving a diagnosis can be a turning point for many women. It can help them understand their past and navigate their future with better support and resources. Women who receive a diagnosis often find that it has a positive impact on their confidence and self-esteem. They may even become advocates or mentors for other women with autism. However, it is important to seek help for any childhood trauma they may have suffered due to their undiagnosed autism.

    Late diagnosis of autism in female adults is a complex issue that requires a greater awareness and understanding. By recognising the unique ways in which autism presents in women, we can ensure that they receive the support and resources they need to thrive. This can lead to a better quality of life and a more inclusive society for all.

    Kayleigh Northall

    Just another WordPress site

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